I Need To Run Away

I think of how all my life was spent in this state,
and of how I hated to be called young.
All this stopped me from following my dreams.
I sometimes wonder if this is my fate,
the words I want to ask sting at my tongue.
My life is falling apart at the very seams.

Every night I lie awake and wonder,
what it is that will become of me.
And is it worth it to have all good intentions?
I sacrifice hours of sleep to just lay and ponder,
about years to come and how my life will be.
My path is filled with so many restrictions.

I think of all the things I didn't do right,
and I often wonder what God thinks about me.
All the times I let my dreams take off and run.
But just before I turn in to say goodnight,
a few more things I try my best to see.
My visions it seems, are not very fun.

The next say I spend at the park in thought,
of all the moments that I let pass.
Not paying attention and lost in a dream.
I reminesce all the lessons that I was tought,
each one passing me by ever so fast.
My mind is nothing but a ripped seam.

I pray to God as I walk back down the street,
wishing for a life that is brand new.
And holding on to the strength I need.
I ask for new faces that I could meet,
and for new tasks that I would have to do.
My body never seems to take heed.

Sometimes I feel as if I just keep falling,
I would love nothing more than to run away.
Run straight to one I could call my friend.
To my God I seem to keep on calling,
asking him to give me a brighter day,
My life feels like it is at it's end.